Before your boyfriend or girlfriend is able to call themselves Airmen they have to go through Basic training. During this time the “Trainees” as they are called by their MTIs will not have the ability to contact you or their families except through writing letters. This fact was on my mind the entire week before my boyfriend left. I knew I wouldn’t be able to see him or hear him for seven and a half weeks. That is completely different than anything I had ever been through and it was scary.
I won’t lie, you will be stressed and terrified and extremely sad the week before your significant other leaves for Basic. I didn’t know what to do with the feelings I was holding inside. I wanted to fall down to his knees and beg him to stay but I also wanted to hold him and tell him I love him and encourage him. I did both of those things before he left. It is so important that you let him/her leave feeling proud and encouraged no matter the feelings you are feeling. He/she is without their family, you, or their home while they are away. If they leave feeling worried about you and their family they may not do their best at Basic because that is all that they are thinking about while they are there.
However, you still need to be open and communicate you true feelings before they leave as well. Its okay to cry and tell them you are scared and will miss them a lot. My boyfriend and I did this several times. The key to a working Military relationship is open communication and that starts as soon as they sign the papers at MEPS the very first time. So tell them all your worries and feelings. They will have plenty to tell you, believe me. This also relieves some of the stress and sadness from the both of you because you won’t have the hidden feelings. Always remember though to tell the truth but don’t be to rash about it. ALWAYS remember to leave them encouraged and proud as I said in the last paragraph.
My boyfriend and I hung out every single day before he left. We tried to do everything we loved to do. We went to the park to eat Chinese, we went to pet stores, we took our dog to the dog park, we ate plenty of McDonald’s, and we did so much more as well. I also helped him train for Basic. I went to this little obstacle course and watched him run it and I encouraged him the whole way. I pretended to yell at him like he was in Basic already. We had so many laughs and cries and hugs during that week. We said goodbye to all his family members and had one last dinner at his grandmothers.
The two days before he boarded his plane were the hardest. The first day I brought him to his recruiters and watched him leave for MEPS on the bus. I cried with his friend and grandmother as he pulled away because that was when it all truly hit me, he was leaving. He was going to be a changed man from now on. The next day his family and I piled into their car. It was his mom and grandma, his sister and brother, and me.It was a two hour ride to MEPS. At MEPS we got the chance to see him one last time before he left to go to the airport. We saw him swear in and gave him the biggest hugs and kisses he had ever gotten. Everyone cried including him and their was no negativity. We all told him we were proud and happy for him, and then we were kicked out of the room and off he went. He got to call me at the airport but as soon as he arrived in Texas that was it.
- Encourage and Praise them for being their for you and following his/her dreams. Tell them they will do amazing. Make sure they know you will be there when they get back.
- Openly communicate your fears and feelings with each other before they leave, but don’t be rash about it and always end it on a good note.
- Spend time doing what you both love to do together. Spend every day together and give them your undivided attention.
- Go with them or their family to all the steps like going to their recruiters and waiting with them before they go to MEPS. Also, make sure you go to MEPS to watch them swear in and say your goodbyes before they officially leave for Basic. They will appreciate it all and it will help them realize that you care for them and follow them on this journey, it shows that you are committed.